Post by Zarnisis on Apr 29, 2006 13:10:37 GMT
WHY THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE IS SO HARD TO LEARN:
1. The bandage was wound around the wound.
2. The farm was used to produce produce.
3. The dump was so full that it had to refuse more refuse.
4. We must polish the Polish furniture.
5. He could lead if he would get the lead out.
6. The soldier decided to desert his dessert in the desert.
7. Since there is no time like the present, he thought it was time to present the present.
8. A bass was painted on the head of the bass drum.
9. When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes.
10. I did not object to the object.
11. The insurance was invalid for the invalid.
12. There was a row among the oarsmen about how to row.
13. They were too close to the door to close it.
14. The buck does certain things when does are present.
There is no egg in eggplant or ham in hamburger, neither apple nor pine in pineapple. English muffins weren't invented in England nor French fries in France. Sweetmeats are candies while sweetbreads, which aren't sweet, are meat.
We take English for granted. . . but if we explore its paradoxes, we find that quicksand can work slowly, boxing rings are square and a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
If the plural of tooth is teeth, why isn't the plural of booth Beth
One goose, two geese. So one moose, two meese?
Doesn't it seem crazy that you can make amends, but not one amend?
If you have a bunch of odds and ends and get rid of all, but one of them, what do you call it?
If teachers taught, why don't preachers praught?
If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat?
Sometimes I think all English speakers should be committed to an asylum for the verbally insane.
In what language do people recite a play and play at a recital, ship by truck and send cargo by ship, have noses that run and feet that smell?
How can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same, while a wise man and a wise guy are opposites?
You have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a language in which your house can burn up as it burns down, in which you fill in a form by filling it out and in which an alarm goes off by going on.
People, not computers, invented English. . . it reflects the creativity of the human race which, of course, is not a race at all.
That is why when the stars are out they are visible, but when the lights are out they are invisible. P. S. Why doesn't BUICK rhyme with QUICK?
1. The bandage was wound around the wound.
2. The farm was used to produce produce.
3. The dump was so full that it had to refuse more refuse.
4. We must polish the Polish furniture.
5. He could lead if he would get the lead out.
6. The soldier decided to desert his dessert in the desert.
7. Since there is no time like the present, he thought it was time to present the present.
8. A bass was painted on the head of the bass drum.
9. When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes.
10. I did not object to the object.
11. The insurance was invalid for the invalid.
12. There was a row among the oarsmen about how to row.
13. They were too close to the door to close it.
14. The buck does certain things when does are present.
There is no egg in eggplant or ham in hamburger, neither apple nor pine in pineapple. English muffins weren't invented in England nor French fries in France. Sweetmeats are candies while sweetbreads, which aren't sweet, are meat.
We take English for granted. . . but if we explore its paradoxes, we find that quicksand can work slowly, boxing rings are square and a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
If the plural of tooth is teeth, why isn't the plural of booth Beth
One goose, two geese. So one moose, two meese?
Doesn't it seem crazy that you can make amends, but not one amend?
If you have a bunch of odds and ends and get rid of all, but one of them, what do you call it?
If teachers taught, why don't preachers praught?
If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat?
Sometimes I think all English speakers should be committed to an asylum for the verbally insane.
In what language do people recite a play and play at a recital, ship by truck and send cargo by ship, have noses that run and feet that smell?
How can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same, while a wise man and a wise guy are opposites?
You have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a language in which your house can burn up as it burns down, in which you fill in a form by filling it out and in which an alarm goes off by going on.
People, not computers, invented English. . . it reflects the creativity of the human race which, of course, is not a race at all.
That is why when the stars are out they are visible, but when the lights are out they are invisible. P. S. Why doesn't BUICK rhyme with QUICK?